Saw some pics of you out with the boats today, and covered in orange paint. So I guess they did the paint war again on Sunday!
Mom is going to pick us up a Crazy Creek chair or two, and I got one of those death-laser UV water purifiers that the hike leader had last year, so we can purify our water. I think I need you to buy me a water bottle again, though. I can’t find my Mondamin one from last year.
The news at home has been… interesting. Something unprecedented, something unbelievable has happened.
We managed to get the mutant animals under control with what remained of your chemistry set, but we had totally forgotten about the radioactive material that’s been sitting around the house for a week now. Turns out, it has slowly been CHANGING THE HOUSE ITSELF. The house is now a thinking, alive creature, kind of like the TARDIS, but less timey-wimey.
It talks to us, and sometimes makes breakfast, but it WILL NOT LET US OUT. We told it we need groceries, and it pulled itself out of the ground, walked down the road on its bricks, and demanded groceries from the local Publix. Of course, the Publix building didn’t respond, because it’s not alive, so the house gave it some radioactive material, and it gave us some food once it came alive.
Then our house marched back to its spot on our street, and here we are. Stuck.
Sure, House is a good chess player, and of course we’re comfortable, but we really need to get outside at some point. I’ve explained that I have to be at Mondamin in a day and a half, so it’s trying to figure out what to do about that. I’m afraid it’s going to walk all the way to Mondamin and go on the hiking trip with us. Our tent is just not that big!
But we’ll see.
I would include some jokes, but the House has demanded that it write you an email with jokes and whatnot, so we’ll see how that goes.
I am allowed to write you the answers to yesterday’s riddles though:
1. Two boys fill out registration forms for summer camp. The registrar notices that they have the same parents, live at the same address, and have the same date of birth. The only difference is that one is named Stuart and the other is Samuel. The registrar says, “Are you twins?” They both answer promptly, “NO!” How could that be?
THEY ARE TRIPLETS.
2. A woman lives on the 14th floor of an apartment building. When she goes to work in the morning she always takes the elevator all the way to the ground floor. But when she returns, many times she takes the elevator only up to the 7th floor and walks the rest of the way up. Why?
BECAUSE SHE IS TOO SHORT TO REACH THE BUTTON FOR THE 14TH FLOOR.
3. There is a man walking down the road dressed entirely in black. There are no lights on anywhere and no moon. A car with no lights comes down the road and manages to avoid the man. How?
BECAUSE IT IS DAYTIME.
c u soon,
Dad, Mom, Scout, and the Animalz