So we ditched the mancub with Stacey’s unsuspecting coworker Sarah, and toddled off to see Mr. Lyle Lovett at Chastain last night. We parked in the Yellow Lot, and almost immediately realized we were Chastain Neophytes, because we had not brought a picnic dinner with us. However, armed with roughly $17,000 worth of concession stand hotdogs (2) and pretzel (1), plus two free thimble fulls of terrible wine from a nearby promotion booth, we settled back for a delightful concert.
The man can sing. Lordy, how he can sing.
Plus, he’s funny. He told us how he loved Atlanta and our big trucks all over the road; they made him feel safe. It’s those little cars that are the danger… they can get caught up under your bumper and wheel.
Hello. I’m the guy who sits next to you and reads your newspaper over your shoulder. Wait, don’t turn the page, I’m not through yet. Life… is so uncertain…
The first time I heard that song, I was in a painting class in college. The class had about 15 people, all set up, concentrating hard, painting away at something or other on easels. Here I Am came on, and I put down my brush after the first line. After the second verse about half the class had put down their brushes and were looking at each other with half-smiles on their face. By “cheeeeeseburger”, the entire class was laughing out loud. A lot of Lyle Lovett albums were sold that day.
…what Corn Flakes are to Post Toasties, what Hank Williams is to Lance Armstrong…
I also learned that I simply don’t have enough Lyle albums, because the ratio of Songs I Know to Songs I Didn’t Know was way too low.
The rain held off (I won’t even say the “R” word tonight), and he sang about his pony and his boat, and his beans and his good cornbread, and his little redneck woman. Francine did a song, and to be honest, I’m not sure that the majority of the audience didn’t come to see her. They were enthusiastic about Lyle, but they were nuts about Francine. Leeeave everything to me.
A good time had by all.
I repeat FRANCINE SINGS AT FUZZY’S ON MONDAY NIGHTS. FOR FREE. Y’all can go with me. We’ll smell like an ashtray, but you haven’t lived until you’ve seen Francine’s fillings when she throws her head back and belts one to heaven.
It didn’t rain because I didn’t go. And because I did that little dance in a circle and wave a chicken bone thing.
She thanked Fuzzy’s in her bit.
I have a fear of Fuzzy’s because I had the Worst Bachelor Party Ever there. But it’s been four years, perhaps I’ll get over it.
Your wife will be there to protect you. I’ll be there to protect the both of you, and to create a distraction should anything untoward happen.
I figger it’ll be okay, since neither of you are likely to try and cajole me into poppin’ down to the Pink Pony.
One never knows, do one? I gave a guy at Jake’s $20 to go to the Pink Pony to get a t-shirt for my employer for Christmas November before last.
One thought one sometimes knew, but now one knows one never knows.
I just quoted The Many Aspects of Mobile Home Living quoting Gone with the Wind in somebody else’s journal. Now I think you have to read it.
The journal or the book? Or both?
The book.
Although what I said in his journal has just cracked me right up. I’m sitting here snickering right now just thinking about myself and my fabulous impersonational abilities.
Will a link be provided, or should I don my flopy Sherlock hat and magnifying glass?
Oh, raycharles. I was remarking on their new house. But I still crack myself up.
Are you referring to his deerstalker hat?
Ah. Check.
Yes’m, I am.
See how funny I was?
Never mind. It’s only really funny if you hear me do it. It’s downright riotous if I do it to someone who talks about their money when they oughtn’t.
You are, indeed, very funny. I’ve always maintained thus.
I will still do it in person some time. Then, by gum, you will know funny.
Some of my friends say my redeeming quality is that I’m really fucking funny. I think it’s that I never, ever say, “We need to talk.”
I think it’s that you’re adept at recommending Alka-Seltzer Cold Plus, the Fizzy Kind.
Oh, my qualities that cause me to need to be redeemed require much more than an OTC medication recommendation for redemption.
Yeah, but that stuff works.
Yep, and a couple of tablets in your toilet for a few hours will clean that, too.
See!? See!? I think if you step back and review the history, you’ll find that all of your friendships are essentially based on your extremely unique ability to recommend A-S C P : F K for various household tasks.
That wouldn’t make you a shallow person… would it?
I think all of my friendships are essentially based on my extremely unique ability to recommend all sorts of things, places, and people to suit different needs.
I’m also a little astonished that you have never played that parlor game Do You Know Susan?
We don’t have a parlor, which would explain it.
Does it involve fake, colorful money? Or chutes and/or ladders? Does one scream “yahtzee” at various points?
I don’t know. I’ve never been there for it, I’ve only heard about it after the fact. It apparently usually starts in a crowded room when someone who has been half listening to several conversations says out loud, “Does anyone here NOT know Susan?”
You’re the toast of the town, which I recently learned from Extraordinary Origins of Everyday Things actually originated from putting burnt toast in cheap wine to make it palatable.
And the original toasts were almost always to admired women. Once a certain woman hit a critical mass of toasts around town… whammo, she’s the toast of the town.
But a parlor game named after you is better than burnt toast.
It’s quite the thing, I must say. Only I can’t ever participate because I can’t very well stand on the table and say “Does anyone NOT know me?”
A lesser game I can participate in is the “Susan, do you know…” game, which entails someone (usually my friend David) asking me if I know someone who, say, rents white chairs, or somewhere to get, say, Alice in Wonderland garden statuary for cheap?
I shall try to play a modified version by asking everyone I know, “do you know Susan?”
I already know Hope Mirlis would answer yes, so I won’t cheat through her.
I don’t imagine Hope Mirlis knows my name. Unless she remembers me telling her that I would send them more money if she’d go in there database and change me from a Mr. to a Ms. or a Miss.
She did, so I did.
And no, that doesn’t make me a shallow person.
now i have onemor that i have to go and see at some point maybe heel be back next year. on the subject of rain say it say it say it. i need it wo rain tonight so that i will not have to do anything at work.
I understand he comes just about every year. And I believe we’ll be making a tradition out of it.
coolness. and now looking at my comment i see that before then i need to learn to type
He does come every year.
And I’m not skipping again.
Even though I’m pretty sure my absence created the lack of rain.
I guess we’ll test that theory next year.
If it rains again, you’re banned for life. Nothin’ personal, you understand. It’s for the greater good.
I don’t think you can ban me from an entire amphitheatre.
Besides, what if Lyle Lovett’s my lobster? Do you want to be the one who keeps us apart? I didn’t think so.
If you are Lyle Lovett’s lobster, then the rains will most assuredly not come.
We must trust the Rain Gods to know these things. If you can’t trust Rain Gods, then whom can you trust?
If I am Lyle Lovett’s lobster, he’d better make haste, because my looks are fading and pretty soon he won’t be able to marry me just because I looked like any her, aside from maybe Ernest Borgnine.
A lobster is a lobster, even if they look like a lobster.
That’s a tennis nickname of mine, actually.
That’s the longest nickname I’ve ever heard.
Yeah, that’s why they shorten it to Lobster.
Hello! I stumbled onto your journal after reading a post you left for stochasticgirl. I couldn’t resist posting after reading your Lyle Lovett entry. *sigh* I’m a big Lyle fan. His lyrics are just so witty and beautiful. He seems to transcend any genre of music. Was that the first time you had seen him live? There’s nothing like seeing him perform live, in my opinion. And if you don’t have “Joshua Judges Ruth”, I’d highly recommend it. 🙂
Hello! Pleased as punch to meet you.
Yes, that was our first Lyle Live. I do have Joshua Judges Ruth, and love it to death. Also, Lyle Lovett and his Large Band and I Love EveryBody, but I know now that I’m missing out on a half dozen or so.
You’re right he’s not terribly catagorizable. A friend told me that the concert I saw was skewed country, and that he kind of switches up the genre of his concerts from year to year, which is very cool.
I look forward to seeing next year’s genre.